Things to ask yourself when conversing with or around a narcissist

  • How can my words be used against me?
  • How can I state my words with enough information to get my point across but not enough for them to have additional “ammo” that they can then distort?
  • Which words are triggers for them? How can I avoid those?
  • How would this communication from my end appear, legally? How would theirs?
  • How can I communicate my intention without subconsciously projecting my wounds or reminding them that they’re triggering me?
  • Where are they trying to lead me?
  • How can I respond as succinctly as possible?
  • Which assumptions am I relying on instead of verbalizing that can cause them to obfuscate my meaning to later use against me, due to lack of specific clarity?
  • How can I draw more information out of them?
  • How can I get them to accidentally admit to their devious intention?
  • Which higher authority can I take their communication to, in order to protect myself?
  • Which logical fallacies are they attempting to use on me? How can I get them back on track or point those out?
  • In which way do they believe themselves to be smarter than me? How can I use this to my advantage?
  • How will they try to have the upper hand?
  • Which assumptions do they rely on about me (I’m stupid, not well-connected, I don’t perceive their intention, I can’t prove their intention, etc.)?
  • Does my narcissist have access to my dairy/ journal, email, texts, accounts, apps, or other data? Is this something they could use against me?
  • How can I expose them for lacking empathy?
  • How can I expose their wild accusations and conclusions?