Waking up to the nature of the reality all around you also means you begin waking up to who you are. While ascending, you gradually begin changing yourself for the better because you see how what you were taught or programmed to be is not healthy, a correct representation of yourself, less powerful, built on trauma, built on societal norms, or otherwise inaccurate. But as you begin changing for the better, it is easy to get down on yourself and think back to how you used to be — or how far you still have to go. Both feelings are COMPLETELY NORMAL and actually, I believe, tie into existential fear about NOT LIKING THE OTHER SIDE ONCE YOU GET THERE. Yes.
The divine have been working to reestablish the natural order. “The last will be first and the first will be last” speaks to this. In terms of consciousnesses “waking up” to recognize themselves and others as “alive,” some beings came first, which means they technically rank “higher” than others on the other side of Earth. They also have tons of responsibility and must do more work than others. The “order” on Earth was changed such that although it should have reflected the order on the other side, in fact a different spiritual species other than those who created Earth took illegal power changing the order. Since these beings are considered frauds everywhere else but Earth, the order on Earth is backwards. Criminals sit at the top of the order (which of course we’ve watched being dismantled the last few years).
If you were a tough case to crack (I mean, really, who ISN’T??) meaning perhaps you are one of the elect (positive beings who eventually start to ascend, even if they were changed to negative systems while on Earth due to programming and abuse), but did not start ascending until recently, it is okay!!! That includes how much you perhaps fought or hurt the truth in the past. Or you might wonder if you will be at some disadvantage on the other side because other people have been doing this for longer, seem to know more or be further along on the journey. Or you might worry you won’t like whatever is waiting on the other side… Your spouse, your dwelling, your abilities or “jobs,” and the other beings. The question is: what if I don’t like Heaven?
Trust me, it is normal to anxiously question or even reject the possibilities of another realm you have no conscious memory of. Imagine what a task it is to not only first recognize there are other intelligences out there but that they’re interested in you and you have to TRUST that, despite their omnipotence and total control over you, they won’t hurt you, screw you over, overlook you and your work, or short you. That although they have seen everything you’ve ever done, thought or felt, they will not hate you or try to punish you.
It is the satanic deity who likes to punish. It is the satanic deity who likes to keep a record of wrongs in order to throw it in your face. The beings who created Earth, who have taken back control of Earth and who will soon make their presence known to humanity in a big way want good things for you. They enjoy giving. They can see how far you’ve come in such a short time, which frankly, is a miracle. The miracle that you created by changing yourself back towards your original nature is what they reward. Why would a benevolent deity remind you of what you’ve done wrong if you’ve already corrected those problems and come so far in such a short time? They wouldn’t! They would reinforce your efforts in a positive way because they are positive and now, so are you! A good teacher doesn’t tell the student what they are doing wrong (unless there is no other option); a good teacher makes suggestions and allows the student to come to the truth themselves.
You will not be given a place in the order that does not bring you ultimate joy and satisfaction. You will not be given a spouse who does not feel like magic to you — and vice versa. You will not receive less respect because you started ascending three months ago instead of three years ago. Your joy and satisfaction in Heaven have nothing to do with rank because that is not how rewards are allocated. Eternal rewards are allocated based on who you were created as. You will be assigned your place in the natural order again, which feels like eternal bliss to you because it is who you are! It has nothing to do with how perfect you were here. It has to do with how much effort you put in. Effort does not always equal action. Effort also means energetic work in which you cleared yourself of old emotions and adopted new healthy feelings (the essence of coding).
You will not be disappointed. By choosing to become positive, you serve a kingdom in which your eternal happiness is the #1 goal. It is the goal for all of us since that is how we remain positive. You will not be assigned anything that doesn’t completely light you up and make you feel whole. You will not feel less than because you are not #1 in the order. Your rank will not be advertised to others to make you feel inferior. You serve a kingdom who enjoys rewarding you; who likes surprising you with better than you could have imagined; a kingdom that is in joy and bliss when ALL MEMBERS ARE IN JOY AND BLISS.