How karmic partners pull you back in

abuse, ascension, chronic illness, core wounds, empath, energy, intuition, karma, narcissism, past lives, relationships, sex, stress

Your karmic partners are the people with whom you share the most challenging relationships. These are the relationships in which you are not allowed to be your true self, there are always strings attached, there are constant checks and balances, there is no unconditional love, and there is little to no support. Chances are you will try time and again to make things healthy with these people but realistically there is just no way it can be done — because both parties must want healthy change. Most often, only one person will desire this and have the strength and courage to do so. In that case, staying in these relationships will start to drain your soul, suck your life force, and bring you pain, misery, and poor health because you are unable to self-actualize.

If you attempt to resolve your karma with these people through the principle of the opposite, it will be very difficult to get away from their grip. They will throw every tactic at you to try to pull you back in, so you cannot see a way forward without them — whether it is because they pull you into further false love and attachment, because they make you question yourself and how you truly feel, or because they threaten you in some way. Once you see their tactics for what they are, you will be able to see reality much more clearly and make decisions that are healthy for you and you alone.

Here are the ways a karmic partner will try to pull you back in:

They offer you fake love: lust or sexual relationships, money, fun outings or socializing, “good/bad” cycles (hurting you then giving you a gift, or hurting you then being nice and kind for a little while only for the cycle to start all over again). This is where you get some of your needs met for a short time, only for things to get unhealthy again. Because you get some needs met sometimes, you wonder if you are in fact the problem rather than the nature of the relationship. You wonder if you should settle.

Brainwashing: This sounds heavy and it is but it happens with karmics. This is where karmic partners purposefully implant false ideas, false realities, doubts, and fear so that you think you are stupid for wanting to leave. It is where you feel out of touch with reality because this person is working so hard to make life seem different than what it really is. Religion, spirituality, legal proceedings, and more can be used here to force a false reality on you. I’ve experienced and had women tell me a partner started quoting the Bible, using tarot cards, the law, and conspiracy videos to appeal to “authority” to convince you that you are wrong in your desire to leave.

Emotional manipulation: Guilt, fear, anger, resentment, belittling, shame, and more will be used by a karmic to try to get you to settle in the relationship. “You’re a bitch”, “you’re emotionally manipulative”, “no one else will ever want you”, “I’ve been so good to you”, “I’ll break you”, “how could you do this to me?”, “you’re unstable”, “you’re crazy”, “you need professional help”, etc. will be thrown at you once this person knows you deserve better.

Taking away your resources: if a karmic has any connection or control over your finances, job, home, or car, they will try to take it from you so you cannot start over without them. Suing you for all of your money, closing bank accounts, trying to coerce you to sign legal documents, trying to coerce you to make them promises that give them power and control, etc. will all be used against you.

Social pressures: If the karmic can’t get to you, they will use others to do this. This means gossiping to their friends and family about your “terrible” decision you made to choose yourself, to try to be healthy, to leave them. In doing so, the social group will often side with the karmic to make you feel bad for wanting to leave. You may feel you cannot leave because if you do, you risk losing your whole social circle. And you also risk blemishing your reputation because they will not stop the defamation until they get what they want.

They throw your deepest fears at you: If none of these things listed above are enough, just know whatever your deepest fears are will be brought to the surface. This is where your core wounds come up and you will be forced to face them (abandonment, rejection, loss of pride, etc). They know if they can use your weaknesses against you, there is a good chance you will stay. Feel the pain and do it anyway.

Getting away is possible. But keep in mind it will not be easy. It will be the hardest thing you have ever done because you are having to overcome seriously strong negative energy and intentions, but also you are having to overcome every past lifetime cycle that was not resolved. Utilize the principle of the opposite, get help from someone who is not connected to the situation, and tune into your intuition to see the correct path you should take. It will be so worth it in the end.

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How to tell if you are in karmic relationships

abuse, chakras, chronic illness, core wounds, empath, energy, intuition, karma, mind-body, narcissism, past lives, relationships, sex, stress

We are all here on Earth to learn lessons. In the past we had the ability to overlook this option and live in lower 3D vibrations where we distracted ourselves with entertainment, illusions, and projections. We’ve pursued comfort, luxury, and pleasure at the expense of the lessons our souls signed up for so long ago. But 5D ascension has arrived and we are being asked to finally choose between the two. Many believe we are here by chance, for no reason, beings stuck on a ball floating in the ether by pure luck. Because of this, seeing signs, synchronicities, and purpose becomes nearly impossible through the contrarian ego. Once you begin to understand who you are on a soul level, your life path, and therefore what you are here to do you can see the bigger picture and how it is all connected and orchestrated.

The biggest part of learning our life lessons involves engaging with other people we have known so many times before. These are the most challenging relationships you will ever have, whether you are close to these people or not because they are karmic partners intent on teaching us the lessons. Without karmic relationships, resolving your karma would be damn near impossible. It is the struggle within the relationships that forces us to reflect, grow, see the interconnectedness, and activate your chakras through the principle of the opposite.

I can’t tell you how many times you have been here before and how many go-rounds you have had at this thing called life. I cannot even gauge that for myself though I have had past life recall of several difficult lifetimes I have had to relive this go round and can read this on others as well in Energy Readings. That said, imagine you have been here hundreds of times in various incarnations. Because of this, the chances you are in relationships with people you have never known before are very slim. This explains why some people are repelled or attracted to each other; why there are longstanding feuds and resentments that seem to stem from nowhere, and why we get triggered when the same pattern repeats itself in the here and now. It also explains why someone can abuse you or display narcissistic tendencies, while they treat others well and others look to them like a god. It just doesn’t add up otherwise.

I want you to know — while you may be blood related to some of these people in this lifetime, anyone who is unable to grow with you or holds you back from personal growth is but a karmic attachment. I’m not advocating dropping friends or family left and right, but I am advocating putting your health above other’s expectations and bad behavior. Instead of feeling obligated to people, remember that you are obligated to yourself and your life’s purpose. Until that clicks for you, you won’t resolve your karmic debt and find mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual peace. From here, you have two options: grow with them (ideally, try at this until you can’t try any longer — until you are lead to see it is a dead end), or grow without them (this will come about once you have exhausted all options and see they are holding back your ascension). As always, the choice is yours.

Also know that it is possible to resolve karma between people but it requires all parties to be on board to change the habits and cycles into healthy, functional relationships. More times than not, however, that doesn’t happen. However, don’t let that keep you from trying. Empaths have been trying for so long and my point here is that you cannot keep putting your happiness on hold because you don’t want to give up on people you love. You can love them but not love the behavior. If they truly love you, they will actively work to resolve the karma. It is possible, it is just not common.

You may wonder the differences between healthy relationships and karmic relationships. Here’s how to know who in your life is a true teacher, no matter how negative the relationship, or no matter how happy it sometimes is:

The relationship has never had true stability; it is constant cycles of happy/sad, make-up/break-up type thing.

You have never felt at ease in the relationship.

You cannot be your true self; you have to change yourself or hold back.

They don’t have your back. They throw you under the bus.

They think of themselves before you or others involved. (Note: this can be done in a healthy way — you should put yourself first, but from a place of boundaries, not selfishness).

They gossip about you to others instead of resolving problems.

You cannot communicate — it is as if you are speaking a different language. Trying to resolve problems always ends in arguments and nothing gets accomplished.

When you want to grow and change for the better, they hold you back. They become insecure, jealous, and needy or purposefully sabotage your efforts.

They withhold love or connection to keep you small.

You have a hard time getting away from these people. They always draw you back in (with money, sex, make-up/break-up cycles, and other forms of manipulation).

They treat you like you are less than them, you will never be good enough, you are always having to earn their approval despite you being worthy in your own right.

They will not address problems with you — there is an amnesia in the relationship in which things are glossed over, never spoken about, and swept under the rug. This is because if problems were acknowledged, it would open Pandora’s box (aka: karma).

Deep down, you don’t trust them or they don’t trust you.

They make you second guess or talk you out of your intuition.

They hide and keep secrets that are detrimental to the relationship. Or they force you to do this for fear of losing their approval.

There are unspoken expectations in the relationship that you have to live up to or there is punishment involved.

They keep you low vibrational — you don’t feel well around them. Your health may have also been severely affected.

You live out very obvious archetypes that have nothing to do with the here and now (ex: slave/slave master, king/queen/peasant, parent/child, brother/sister, lovers, teacher/student, etc.).

How to open your heart chakra

chakras, core wounds, energy, fascia, karma, mind-body, relationships, sex, stress

Every single person alive on the planet is seeking love in their own unique way. Some have confused love for validation, acceptance, or grand displays of affection. Others have confused love with pain, heartache, and rejection based on their past experiences and in anticipation of future painful events. Some avoid love even when it looks them in the eye.

As I have said before, real love is unconditional, whether it comes from a romantic partner, parent, friend, or family member. Unfortunately, real love is also very hard to come by. You see, we have been taught to only give love to certain people and only receive it from others. We have been taught if want love, we must have something to give first. We have constantly opened and closed our hearts in the presence of others because we thought they deserved it or they didn’t — or because we were punished or judged for offering it in the first place (“there must be a string attached; they must be slutty/players/egotistical”).

In contrast, a peaceful world would look like humans giving and receiving love always, to anyone, simply because it is another soul. The level of love would not need to vary, but perhaps the expression would. You wouldn’t love the gas station clerk the same way you love your child, but you can still exude love, empathy, and respect nonetheless. You can still look them in the eye and smile and care, regardless of not appreciating how they did or did not treat you. It’s separating love from roles, karma, and shitty behavior.  

It’s not enough to just open your heart chakra. You have to figure out why it was blocked to begin with, and you also have to figure out why you are rejecting love at this very moment. Yes, you are — we all are. It is not enough to want to get love or give love. Unless you are actually open to receiving it, there is nothing you or anyone else can do to make you feel loved. Often, we choose partners who we subconsciously feel are unable to reciprocate love because it is easier to be slowly rejected or not truly seen. 

Not being able to receive love comes from a fear of being unworthy. Unworthy because of your past mistakes, unworthy because of what you lack, unworthy because few others have ever offered it to you in its pure form, unworthy because of how you have been treated. “It must be because I am inadequate” you may believe. 

If you are energetically sensitive or want to be, start with this visualization: locate your heart inside of your body. How does it feel? Tune into it deeply. You may be surprised to feel there is literal pain inside the organ itself, not just surrounding it, and not just emotional pain but literal physical pain that has embedded itself into the structure. Identify one tiny speck of pain — separate the individual pains from the overall pain — and acknowledge it, ask where it came from, then consciously release it. You should feel lighter instantly. Do this until your heart doesn’t ache. 

I have noticed many people have a literal energetic split in their hearts — a line down the middle separating the left and right ventricles (at the pulmonary valve), as though there is a chasm indicating a separation between masculine and feminine love and the ability to integrate the two. I’m not just talking about those with literal heart problems (though heart disease is a severe manifestation of a broken heart when we’re talking metaphysics). I mean we have craved feminine love (openness, receptiveness and whether you are a male or female doesn’t matter) but have been forced into more masculine displays of love because we have lived in a masculine system thus far. We have accepted the masculine love because we didn’t know there was another option, an option in which your soul can take the lead, rather than your physical body, superficial gifts, or desire to hide how you really feel because it was “childish”.

Many also have lodged their heart deep into their throat chakras. You have learned not to say the words you really want to say because of how you have been hurt or rejected in the past; because of how you were told love is naive, needy, silly and will cause you problems — or that the kind of love you want just doesn’t exist; how only children open their hearts and adults must learn to hide them because that’s what it means to age. A blocked throat chakra isn’t just about fear of speaking, being heard or seen, or finding the right words as to not risk rejection; it is about holding back your expressions of love.

The heart chakra is also called the fourth chakra. Understand that generally depictions of the chakras involve the front of the body — energy centers moving up from the base of the pelvis to the top of the head. But the energy isn’t intended to come in without exiting. It must be able to flow through or pass through the entire human structure without getting blocked. In this case, because the heart chakra is in the chest, you may notice upper back problems or thickening of the fascia between your shoulder blades. A blocked heart chakra can also cause breathing problems (which can lead to anxiety, allergies, poor sleep, and more), chest pains, and other chest restrictions as if you were wearing a very tight girdle around the area. It can also cause you to have very tight or restricted movement in your left shoulder blade (because, of course, the heart sits in the front left chamber of the chest). So don’t just look for fascial adhesions on the front of your chest (an indication you were blocking love from entering), also look to the upper back (to see if you were preventing it from truly touching your soul, or were trying to prevent it from leaving for fear of abandonment). Sometimes I see people (both men and women) who have such tight, thick skin (fascial adhesions) on their chest or upper back, I feel a huge density and wonder how they’re still breathing. It’s not a myth that you can die from a broken heart; fascia restricts blood flow, nutrients, and more to those areas. 

How to open your heart chakra:

  • Identify your core wounds and life lessons — these will tell you why you are rejecting or scared of love
  • Understand that real love is unconditional, without constant checks and balances, you can never get better in order to receive love, and if you mess up you can still be worthy of love
  • Get rid of fascial adhesions on your chest and upper back with myofascial release
  • Do energy work to eliminate old, toxic energies from your heart center
  • Offer love that is from the soul, rather than the 3D world
  • Accept that those who cannot love you back and in their own pain and wounds
  • Love yourself unconditionally, flaws and all
  • Figure out how your definition of love varies from true love because this will cause you pain
  • Accept what others have done to you in the past without projecting it onto the future — remain present
  • Offer love to everyone (kindness, respect, care) without expecting anything in return
  • Identify social or relationships problems and work to remedy them (complicity or being lukewarm is the antithesis of love); ie: change the karma; love is a feeling but also an action
  • Forgive yourself and others
  • Stop cycles of self-hatred or dependence on vices to feel okay
  • Breathe deeply
  • Stretch

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