This is information I have wanted to share for quite some time. For years I hid the fact that I have had supernatural experiences because of the great shame and societal pressures to stay quiet. As I mention in my book How to Become Intuitive, after these experiences, I turned to trusted friends and family who immediately wrote me off and our relationships turned sour. A soulmate spark in the eye that two people witnessed? I recognized someone I didn’t know — and they, me? Past life love? A black flash of light between myself and a karmic partner that we both saw and that caused us to black out for a few good seconds — and stumble, then mumble jumbled words when we came to? What in the hell was I talking about? They didn’t have any idea and at the time, either did I. Not only that but I lacked the vocabulary to effectively explain what I had witnessed. They only received the bits and pieces I could string together, which didn’t illustrate the entire story. We were all confused.
If I couldn’t understand what I had experienced, how were they to? In fact, after sharing this information with certain people (karmic partners), I was dragged to court, forced to comply with an extensive psychological evaluation to prove my sanity, and came out the other side a changed woman. See, experiencing the supernatural isn’t just a shock to everything you have ever believed to be true — it is also something that can be weaponized against you. For me, I proved myself over and over again in a court of law. The other parties simply could not believe it possible to be a sane person who had experienced unexplained paranormal phenomenon. But that is exactly the case. And that is why I want to share this information with you.
First, understand that we live in a world of naysayers. The first thing you will want to do after a supernatural experience is tell those closest to you. You need someone to confirm what you have witnessed. You want them to be as curious and perplexed as you are. You want to convince others there is “more”. Unfortunately, the chances of you receiving any affirmation or validation is rather slim. Please understand that this speaks more to the state of their ego than your experience. Coming face to face with the divine or an unexplained “other” forces you to shed your ego (the 3-dimensional brainwashing we all receive from birth about what is real, true, and acceptable to be and to believe) and look the divine in the eye.
Yes, after a supernatural experience, you will find yourself smack dab in the middle of an ego death where everything you thought was true about the world has melted away in a split second. There is no gradualness or baby step to be found. There is now a “before” and an “after” and you are not sure which to believe. Seeing beyond the veil is a gift, but also, it is a serious reality check. While billions of people worldwide may say they believe in a higher power and worship prophets or messiahs whose message is a supernatural one in nature, when it comes to the brass tacks of daily life, believing in miracles and experiencing one truly draws a line in the sand. Did it happen or did it not? Will you believe it or will you write it off? Are you courageous enough to suspend your entire belief system and everything you have ever known?
You may spend years of your life reliving those events. You may spend years trying to make sense of it. Where could the flaw in your memory be? How else could this be explained? How did the people around you respond? What could have forced you into an altered state? You pick yourself apart, bit by sorry bit. You continue to try telling others but it falls on deaf ears. “Why are they not completely, utterly moved by this?” you will ask yourself. Unfortunately, if you are someone that the 3D system does not consider “valid”, you will have a more difficult time. Women, minorities, the economically disadvantaged, artists, children, and even the elderly will have a much harder time convincing anyone of the truth. They are much more likely to be written off and diagnosed.
After friends and family wouldn’t listen, I eventually turned to the internet to see what kinds of information I could find. I stumbled upon entire communities of people asking the same questions: “I was talking to a neighbor girl… I’m 45 and she’s 16. Suddenly a flash of light met between our eyes. I said, ‘Whoa, what was that?’ She said, ‘I don’t know!’ I fell in love with her but she’s only 16. What do I do?” Then I thought, if other people are also having unexplained experiences, maybe there are counselors out there who work with this kind of strange phenomena. My first two calls didn’t go so well. One, a spiritual coach who called herself an “Indigo.” I explained the situation to her and asked her what she thought. “Well, we will have to discuss this further. How much of a down payment can you make today?” she asked me. “Nothing,” I said. The call didn’t go anywhere after that. Next I found a woman who researched the paranormal for a living and who also happened to be a clinical psychologist. I asked if she had ever counseled anyone after such an experience. “No, I haven’t really thought about it I guess,” she said. And then the line went blank.
Eventually I realized I would have to reconcile these things myself. It took years but I finally got to a point where I could no longer doubt what had happened to me because I had never seen something like it before — or since. Also, when an experience alters your life so dramatically that you simply cannot go back to your old way of thinking or living, you know it’s authentic. You know it happened, and you know it’s real. In my case, I had the “luxury” of at least two other people also admitting to sharing these experiences with me (in so many words), though I still couldn’t get a straight answer out of them which drove me into further shame and hiding. They were dealing with their own egos and nothing I said or did could draw out the unedited truth. After years, I decided it was okay to become the lone wolf and I admitted what I saw, what I lived, and now I know nothing could ever change what happened to me.
This journey is lonely, yes. This journey is also a major ego reckoning. In all honesty, from what I have read, some people go into deep depressions, some abuse substances, and some kill themselves because the stigma is so great. Or, the shame of being diagnosed and labeled as mentally ill forces a person who has seen the divine to hide the greatest gift they have ever been given. Both are not a symptom of mental illness but can in fact contribute to it as a result of the cognitive dissonance. I do believe a serious conversation needs to be had about the legitimate differences between a person tormented with mental illness and a person who cannot reconcile the supernatural. One experience is a string of daily pain, and one is characterized by marked, dramatic one-time events that make you a better person.
As an Intuitive, my first inkling someone is telling the truth about a paranormal encounter is either that they feel ashamed to divulge something so “deep”, or that they are grasping for words to explain the beauty of what they have seen. After your own experiences, do you fit into this category? Do you also have a completely new life after the fact? Do you know there is no going back? Do you see life more clearly and understand the greater meaning of it all? Do you want to be a better person? These are all indications you should accept what has happened to you.
Additionally, please come to terms with the fact that likely no one will be able to validate what you have lived. This desire is another indication what you saw was real. A person who has not had such a jaw-dropping experience will likely not care to crowd-source opinions to hopefully, one day, find that sage or guru who will explain the meaning to you. So far, I haven’t found one. The point is to become your own wise woman/man and be able to recognize this pain in others and also to remind the world that there is more.
First, an announcement. I wrote a book. A book full of invaluable information for you that will be published in the next few months. It’s called How To Become Intuitive. As soon as this current editing stage is done with the publishing company, I’ll be sharing pieces of it here on my blog. The knowledge contained in it is so vast and complex but essentially, it’s a guide to trusting your first instinct, why you/humanity hasn’t thus far, and how to tap back into your logical and mystical intuition once more in order to spiritually ascend — and the reality of what happens when you do. I explain how I once was an agnostic using my intuition for “second opinion” approaches with nutrition and my client’s physical health, and how a silent vow to the sky landed me in a world full of metaphysics, chakras, past lives, and supernatural experiences. My ego was dying and I began to see the world for what it really is, beyond the veil of falsehood. Through experience, I learned the words of the great ascended masters are true and everything they tried to teach us so long ago is still applicable — integral, in fact — to our daily lives. I learned that truth is truly stranger than fiction. As I say in my book, it wasn’t something I necessarily wanted to publish — it was something I needed to publish. I will be opening up pre-orders soon. Thank you for your support in advance. <3
Now, onto the empaths who can’t emote.
I have written before about strange adaptive methods empaths adopt, including The Empaths Who Act Like Narcissists. You can think of all human beings as possessing two separate operating systems. One is the subconscious mind which houses our real selves and true vibrational operating system. The other is the ego, the false persona we are forced into — or find our way into on our own — in order to be liked, successful, and never have to confront our own wounding. Most people operate out of either the ego or a mixture of both. Empaths, however, may take on an ego but it never truly feels like home. So a person can be born an empath, have a soul vibration of empathy, and yet act entirely narcissistic because of adverse experiences. It’s like they’re hiding their scared inner child.
Recently I have come across another kind of empath adaptation that is much harder to spot. These are the empaths who can’t presently emote. In other words, the hallmark sign of an empath is the level of emotion they release as an energetic frequency. That doesn’t mean these people are always crying and sad. It means they’re adept and have the inherent skill for turning a thing (intention, feeling, experience, expectation) into an invisible energy they then project as their own. They transmute and/or they translate a thing into an energy, an energy into a meaning, a meaning into an understanding. The empaths who can’t emote, though, lack the emotional programming in order to feel such feelings at all.
Typically, an empath’s emoting is directed inwards but ends up leaking outwards because empaths (until they are aware, at least) do not know how to stop leaking energy. This means an empath’s personal emotions will be leaked, how they feel about others and external circumstances will be leaked, how others are feeling will be leaked, how they feel about others leaks, and they will leak when others flat out ask or subconsciously demand it of them. This is because an empath’s subconscious mind is their natural state and this part of the brain is where authentic feelings are housed. Simply put, they leak vibrational frequencies all day long in response to what has happened in the past, what is presently happening, or who they or others are on a soul level.
The empaths who cannot emote (let’s call them ECE’s for short), on the other hand, share some similar characteristics. First they were either neglected as children, received no love or emotional nurturing, were otherwise abused, or shut down due to another trigger as they went on in life. They stopped feeling or never learned how to in the first place. Sometimes it presents in the form of pain in the body but cluelessness regarding their own emotional pain (aka: “I’m fine. I don’t think I have any trauma” despite having tons). It can also manifest as someone who feels apathetic but wishes they didn’t. Or in some cases it’s the person who wants a better life for themselves but feels a literal blank spot in their mind like they’ve blacked out certain memories which they therefore cannot access or feel.
The difference between these people and narcissists or sociopaths is that the ECE’s still possess compassion, still give love, and still on some level desire to work through their pain. They are OPEN to the idea of personal development, change, and correcting their thoughts or behavioral patterns. They also have a fair perspective of others and do not actively work to harm. They want to change, they just don’t see how they can. They want to feel, they just don’t remember what it’s like to do so. In other words, they don’t want to be in denial but aren’t sure how or why to get out of it.
In the past I may have considered these people somewhere on the middle of the empath to narcissist spectrum; not narcissistic but not highly sensitive. Now though, I see these people are a severe manifestation of abuse. In fact, as an Intuitive, ECE’S are the hardest people for me to “read” because it’s not enough for me to listen to what a person is telling me or observe how they are acting — I also have to read their energy for the truth. Naturally, ECE’S cannot presently emote so these tend to be my most difficult cases. Even they themselves do not know how they feel.
There is hope for ECE’S, though. Reversing this phenomenon requires a person tap back into their divine feminine energy (aka subconscious mind) in order to begin expressing emotion without fear. They typically operate from a purely logical mindset in which they fit into the toxic masculine system quite well as left-brained reasoners rather than right-brained spontaneous feelers. They must admit to their suppressed emotions and actually, actively make a point to feel them whenever and wherever they arise. Balancing these two aspects of the self and no longer being ashamed of the “irrational” feeling self is essential for healing.
Empathic people are born “that way”. We can’t choose if we are born with a high, often painful, degree of empathy for others and the world. We see pain, we internalize it, we feel it, we fret over it, we end up hurting ourselves in the long run. We know something isn’t right here, but until recently, we didn’t know empathy is also a call to action — a remedy for a world full of ills.
Empathy can also be learned, or re-learned, though, as it is our normal human state and during the shedding of the ego process, hypothetically, anyone can access their true nature once again. That may be difficult to believe once you have taken off the rose-colored glasses and seen the degrees of narcissism we are dealing with on this planet. Thanks to our monkey brain remnants, vanity and self-protection, we’ve been told, are essential to our survival here. Want to get by? You better make sure you are liked, successful, and fit in.
So an empath tries to skate by, or fly under the radar most of their lives — not feeling entirely sure of their purpose here, or what they can do to make things better. They are but one person in a sea of cut-throat actors playing a part. One day, if they are lucky, they begin to piece together all of their life experiences, observations, and feelings about life and Earth. They begin to awaken out of the cognitive dissonance that has kept them small and quiet, unsure of themselves and what is truly transpiring. They begin to trust themselves enough to see clearly.
You see, the awakening process is only the start. After you have awakened, you then begin the process of healing old wounds via learning your life lessons. When you do, you realize you have the power you have never been naturally bestowed. You realize you have a mission here — and this transcends doing “good” deeds to help others. You realize you want to commit to this purpose no matter the external pressures or consequences. You see that the real purpose of empathy is not just about spreading loving kindness. The true purpose is to help ensure the survival of the species. And this, you will learn, is your reason for being here at this time.
Empathy is not just a feeling or high degree of care and concern for others. It is a method for preserving the planet’s natural resources and ecology, and teaching and engaging in animal-first, plant-first, water-first, air-first, and human-first ideologies in order to ensure our survival. In other words, empathy is in direct contradiction to entropy. Entropy is the decay and destruction that occurs when there is no purposeful plan, no central goal, no agreed upon desired outcome. Entropy is full of chaos, selfishness, confusion, and desolation. Entropy can only exist when a majority of people are not engaged in empathy because empathy naturally prevents entropy. Narcissism and the cut throat survival-of-the-fittest monkey brain tactics are the physical manifestation of entropy. Empathy, that is, acting from your higher self rather than your animalistic brain, naturally halts such destruction.
When you understand the cause and effect of your behavior, you are less likely to harm and destroy. You are more likely to understand what will be damaged or lost as a result of personal choices — even if it does not directly benefit you. You are more likely to show forethought and planning in order to reach a goal that can benefit everyone, not just one person — or a few “chosen” people. You will care about the wounding you inflict on others because you know that hurt people hurt others, and if we want to stop cycles of pain, loss, and disease, we have to stop hurting each other. If we are all hurt, there is no one to stop the cycles of entropy; at least, not without a monumental effort first.
The function of empathy is not just interpersonal peace, equality, and understanding. The function is world peace and world preservation. An ego-driven brain will only ever consider its immediate needs — things that bring it clout, money, “friends”, and power. As such, we will continue to live in an imperfect, slowly decaying world. People being sickened, animals dying, plants being edged out of their habitats, water and air polluted — all in an effort to make money, have industrial needs met, and show who is bigger and badder in the ways of commerce; bigger in badder in the ability to show off to friends and family what one has acquired in their time here.
Empaths, please hear me when I say this: you are not just here to feel. You are here to do. To show there is another way. To call out evil when you see it, not as a personal affront, but as a means of helping to preserve the planet and its species. If some people decide they don’t like you because you can no longer appease their ego, if you have to shake up some egos in the process, well, isn’t that worth it?
A few years ago I had a long-time client sitting in my office. She had initially seen me for nutrition support for a goiter (we had success) then she came to me for mind-body work. I remember we were speaking about some difficult family relationships, but she started musing on the story of the Tower of Babel. She was a Christian woman with a penchant for Energy Readings and she was able to seamlessly integrate the two. Spiritual work and her faith were not at odds with each other, they were supportive.
Her stream of consciousness about stress in her relationships lead her back to this Biblical story. She wondered if, although perhaps just parable, it held a deeper meaning for our lives. What if the story of the Tower of Babel (in which God saw the pride in the people’s hearts and caused them to begin speaking different languages, unable to communicate with each other) wasn’t so much about language but more about confusion? What if was a story about ego — a false mask imposed on us, unable to see the truth in others or ourselves, leading to much confusion in our interactions? What if the ego keeps us from understanding each other since the ego is a projection of the past?
Have you ever tried to have a conversation with someone and they literally couldn’t hear you? I don’t mean they weren’t listening (though maybe they weren’t) — and I don’t mean with people who are genuinely hard of hearing or have a sensory processing disorder. I mean they had a hard time hearing the actual words you were saying. I mean a conversation with someone who is capable of hearing you but just can’t — for whatever reason: you’re in line at a quiet restaurant and the waitress can’t understand your order but can hear the person behind you perfectly fine — or something to that effect. We have all been there. It becomes frustrating.
Communication isn’t just about the words we speak, the intonation of our voice, our word choice, the language of origin, etc. Communication is also infused with energy and intention, each and every time we speak or express ourselves non-verbally. Empaths do this hard without realizing. Those who are not empathic do it as well. The difference is that empaths expect others to “get it” on an instinctive level and are usually disappointed when others cannot feel their intentions. They get caught in a merry-go-round, often, of vague communication because “you should be able to feel my intention”.
Narcissistic people also use their energy to communicate that which cannot be said. They use strong, heavy energy that feel intimidating to an empath, in order to get their way. These are the people you know if you say “no” to they will not be happy. Or the people with whom you are scared to express your needs. You just know it won’t go over well because their energy doesn’t ask or implore — it downright tells you what to do.
Now, as the planet shifts further into ascension mode (that is, forgoing the 3-dimensional distractions and illusions that kept us busy or semi-satisfied but altogether distracted from your life’s purpose in the past, into pursuing matters of the soul), miscommunications are bound to occur — in fact, they are already transpiring. You see, communication is about frequency. As a highly sensitive person, you are in tune with the frequency of others, whether you realize it or not. Unless you were born with an unshakable external confidence (not so common for empaths who have been bullied their whole lives), you have always mimicked other people’s frequency — their soul’s blueprint, thumbprint, energetic intention, if you will — to blend in.
Now that you are no longer able to blend in like you were in the past, and as you become more confident in your pure energy body (the energy from your soul that you no longer want to change or alter to please others), they won’t be able to understand you as readily. In the past you came to their level, you changed yourself, you adapted. Now you can’t do that without feeling you are somehow cheapening yourself; without feeling used or taken advantage of, or controlled.
When the frequencies between their expectations and your actions diverge, they won’t be able to hear you — plain and simple. You can say blue and they’ll hear green. That sort of thing. It is about basic wording as much as it is about intention at this point. Or perhaps you’ll have good intentions with your words but they’ll assume the worst of you. It can get frustrating because as an empath you are living both in the present and you are also being called to a future in a world that isn’t fallen or imperfect. You see both at once and aren’t always sure how to navigate.
Begin to take stock of these interactions. It will help you make sense of your ascension process. And it is a good benchmark for your progress. You may also begin to notice you are becoming increasingly dissatisfied with interactions with others in general because you sense their hearts are closed, they are judgmental, they are cold or curt, they are disconnected, they lack a spark behind their eyes, and on and on. You will begin to seek out people who not only understand you, but people you can feel at home with — who get you without you having to explain. This is another good sign. Since ascension is all about raising your own vibration to one of love, peace, and harmony, anyone who does not fit that energetic profile will no longer seem appealing to you.
Sometimes in these interactions it is hard to decipher what deserves your attention and what does not. You no longer want to be a doormat but you also don’t want to get energetically pulled into drama. If they were rude, do you say anything back? Do you call them out on it? Or do you go about your business? My rule of thumb is this: I call out evil when I see it is affecting me or others on a deep level. One rude interaction doesn’t affect me because I see it is about them. Someone going out of their way to make life harder for you or someone else, though, that is an evil unto itself and should be doused with the light of day in order to stop the cycle. Use your discretion of course, according to the situation.
Remember, we’ve been witnessing an unraveling of karma these last few years. Those who are unaware they have any karma to begin with will be in constant reactionary mode and will be addicted to negative emotions and behaviors. Those who have done the soul work are the ones ascending. The differences in our energy and behavior makes this distinction clear. I don’t say this to judge, I say it to help you. If you have pure intentions, these miscommunications aren’t about you — it is about the journey you are on and it about others trying to project their ego onto you. Be prepared to have to go out of your way to be clear from here on out.
Karma isn’t just a sequence of unfortunate events or punishment for bad behavior. It is a long trail backwards of cause and effect, and it happens for a variety of reasons, not necessarily because you “deserve” it despite what you may have heard. Instead, it’s a reflection of Newton’s third law: everything affects everything else and will have an impact down the road, whether we anticipate it or not. And it will happen to you no matter your religious or spiritual beliefs because it is basic physics.
I was sitting in a salon yesterday for a haircut and while I waited, I listened to a hairdresser (rather loudly) tell another client her lengthy family history and drama without abandon: her mother grew up as the mother figure when she was only a child; this woman’s mother acted more like a teenager rather than caregiver, and when they all tried to move in together this week (despite the painful past), the grandmother (who happened to be dying of cancer) realized after one day and one too many fights it wasn’t going to work out so she secretly packed up her bags and headed back home from Texas to Michigan. And no one wanted to talk about it. Whew.
As I always say, we all have problems. Every person and every family or circle of friends/community has deep-rooted underlying issues, despite many working hard to pretend there are no issues. I enjoy the people who are brave enough to admit to the problems — and respect those who actually want to work through them.
In a situation like the above you may think, well, those are some family issues that are unfortunate and may never be resolved. But when I hear these kinds of things I think back to what led these people to this place in life and what would be required to make it better (and therefore change the karma).
There are really simple ways to understand karma and I want to challenge you to begin using these tools so you can see how karmic storylines are playing out in your life and therefore, how to improve them — which is everyone’s responsibility while alive here.
First, dig really deep to identify the core wound associated in the situation. In this example, the core wounds would be abandonment (getting triggered in the mother, based on her childhood) and lack of help, and a grandmother who is always avoidant, shuts off, and runs when things gets hard or leaves others to pick up the pieces. Realistically, the daughter wants her mother to be the adult, do the responsible thing, admit to what she lacked as a parent, and show unconditional love despite her daughter’s resentment. You see, the roles were reversed and it caused everyone great pain. The daughter wants a mother (instead of having to be her own mother) and the grandmother likely had a childhood in which she was expected to be responsible far too young and she rebelled which could overwhelm her, or perhaps because she was now sick she also needed care and unconditional love. Do you see how the cycle keeps repeating?
Once you understand the core wound, you can see why this situation is transpiring to begin with. It’s not for no reason — it’s because the people involved are triggering each other’s core wounds; if so, they will just repeat in situation after situation, lifetime after lifetime no matter which sex or role you are born into. When you address the situation head on and find compassion, empathy, and compromise, you can resolve your core wounds so this kind of thing doesn’t happen again. So you can grow instead of retreat and repeat.
In the above example, changing the karma would require a hard conversation. It would require all parties see beyond the circumstantial triggers (arguments about silly things that never get to the root of the issues/core wounds) and talk about the depth of their wound in order for the other to truly understand. It would also require genuine listening and the desire from others to resolve the issue no matter what, ie: weakening their own ego for the sake of someone else.
Secondly, look back to all famous works of literature, or even popular shows and books. What is embedded into the collective unconscious is no mistake. The stories we keep telling and sharing with the world at large are as old as time itself. Yes the characters and intricacies of the plot change, but the overarching themes are the same. In nearly every story you read or watch, a common denominator is that the characters are presented with a choice: do I repeat the past or do I venture into the brave unknown? Do I forgo what everyone else wants or expects of me or do I choose my own path? Are we all going to keep doing what is easy or will anyone choose the difficult thing? Who will prevent the truth or good from rising and who will fight to expose it? Who will come up with solutions and who will allow the problems to persist? If I choose my own path, what is the punishment I will face? Does the fear of that outweigh the truth of what is in my soul?
Karmic storyline character roles:
- The twin flames: fight constantly, passive aggressive if only for comedic effect or can also be overtly aggressive, very high masculine and high feminine, or one is integrated and one not; abusive relationship. One may actively try to make things better (grow), but not always.
- Distractor: comes in to “swipe” the scene clean and create a transition to a new topic, or so everyone forgets what just happened – sometimes for comic relief, to control the conversation or groupthink, sex appeal, etc.
- Narcissist: the fearless, egoful leader who gets everyone into trouble and out of trouble, manipulates the entire situation to get his way or make sure no one lets onto what he is doing, earns the favor of others especially those in authority, abuses others then justifies or blames it on victim. He may try to do the right thing every now and then to save face but will always go back to control or abuse.
- The lackeys: carrying out sinister deeds on behalf of the narcissist leader(s) so they stay in the good graces and receive benefits from the leader. They assume they will be protected, but the leader may eventually turn against them too.
- Empath: the sweet, sensitive, king or queen type energy who tries to bring everyone to their senses and do the right thing but is not heard or purposefully quieted. The narcissistic leader/abuser generally targets them to “astroturf” their reality. The narc may eventually fess up and say they will never do it again and there may be a forgive and forget mentality, or the victim may remain hurt.
- Soul mates: any two people on the same wavelength and always work together when problems arise.
- The wise one/mentor: warns the characters about the dangers, but the characters often do not listen then feel bad afterwards and realize he/she were right; helps others learn the lesson.
- The groupthink background actors/the “mob”: mindlessly supporting the narcissists in order to not be targeted themselves or in order to fit in. May remain silent or may perpetuate groupthink gossip. Refuse to think for themselves.
Use this information to your advantage to identify the storylines you are in, your role and the role of others, and how to escape them or turn them on their heads.