The real differences between twin flames and soulmates

abuse, chakras, empath, energy, intuition, karma, mind-body, narcissism, past lives, relationships, sex, stress

The terms “twin flames” and “soulmates” get thrown around a lot within the metaphysical community and I have seen there is much confusion about what exactly they are, how they differ, and their purposes in our lives. I want to clear that up today because I think it is leading people astray. Understanding these two roles helps people to overcome their karma, which is what keeps us stressed and sick. Overall, it’s beneficial for you to get acquainted with the correct meaning of these words. 

As an Intuitive, I channel information (and always have, even before I knew what an Intuitive was) and I also rely on observation and cause and effect, reading the subconscious mind, as well as reflection on my personal experiences and the experiences of my clients to lead me to the truth. As I have said before, the truth doesn’t care about our preexisting beliefs or comfort, so I too have to put aside my ego and conscious mind in order to find the correct information to bring to you. This information is a years-long process of that very thing and I take it extremely seriously. 

Unfortunately, there are little to no societal supports for those people who have had such supernatural experiences (as I detail below). Having a traumatic twin flame experience, or having an other-worldly soulmate experience can leave many traumatized, unable to cope with what they have witnessed and felt, and leave them questioning their mental health. It is a total upheaval of everything you have ever been taught or rested on as truth.

Metaphysics has become a “choice”much like religious dogma, rather than a fact of life on Earth. Ancient peoples wrote about their supernatural experiences extensively and this truth permeated their societies and understanding of the world. Instead of honoring these legacies with curiosity, we discount them as primitive. Famous geniuses who have made major contributions to our world have considered metaphysics to be as essential to science as mathematics, and yet we still discount this. We choose a side to cling to forever to feel comfort in a changing world. We are slaves to our contrarian egos in this “3D” world despite the reality of existence being so much more vast than we could ever imagine. Magical things are transpiring right before our very eyes and we will only see them if we are open to the possibility. 

Before you begin reading my thoughts below, I will leave you with this: “Therefore, trust not what is seen but what is unseen, for what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”

Twin Flames and Soulmates

I want to start by saying that we all have souls we are meant to come in contact and into relationship with in order to learn our lessons and overcome our core wounds (aka: karma). Whether we recognize this, or choose to do so is up to each individual. Will you repeat the same soul patterns, or will you identify and overcome them to find true health and happiness?

The relationships that are the most challenging are the ones your soul has chosen to learn from in order to overcome your wounds and reach your highest potential. There are no accidents in life and so you have been drawn to certain people in order to learn your lessons. While many of these people take us to our darkest places, and while the relationships may feel painful, or while they may do things to us that are not right and never will be, it is not necessarily a bad thing — it’s about our perspective. Yes, what they cause in our lives can feel bad and harm us but they will only harm us in the long term if we forgo learning the lessons. (The exception, of course, is abuse, which should never be tolerated and cancels out any soul contracts). Once we admit to our own lessons and begin working on them, you can take back your power, happiness, and purpose here.

You may have heard of the term Twin Flame before, and there is much confusion around this. Twin flame is often used interchangeably with the term Soulmate, but in fact they are not the same.

The purpose of a twin flame is to push you to learn your lessons and overcome karma. The purpose of soulmates is oneness and is so much bigger than that of basic attraction. In fact your twin flame or soulmate may not be a romantic partner, but could be a parent, child, friend, or sibling. Most often though, they do tend to be romantic partners because these are our most intimate, vulnerable relationships. 

Twin flames are the relationship(s) we are in while we work out karma that we are indebted to (aka the cause and effect that we never resolved). Twin flame relationships are the most challenging relationships you will ever have. A twin flame is like a backwards reflection of you. They bring up all of the negative qualities in yourself that are not for your greatest good. They can take what you do and say and use it against you, all while making it sound perfectly reasonable. They say one thing and do another. You feel confused and chaotic because of what they do to you. You keep trying to connect but can’t fully get through to each other, always oil and water trying to make it work but ultimately causing each other great pain and resistance. They can be jealous and co-dependent or cause that to stir within you. Sometimes you have to force the attraction to stay together.

Twin flame relationships burn hard and fast; they are all-consuming and fiery. Sometimes you see it as the couple that has been married 50 years and has no plans for divorce but genuinely do not like each other or get along, despite pretending to. Other times you see it as the young love that clouds your vision and forces you to put all red flags out of mind to pursue the person at your own expense. It can manifest as sexual or emotional addiction, addiction to anger and fighting, or a longing for something “more” that you feel you cannot get from this person.  

If you are in a romantic relationship with a twin flame, it will be very challenging. It is literally as if you two speak a different language — because you do! Often twin flame relationships are comprised of one empathic person and one narcissistic person (though they can also be made up of one empath and one emotionally apathetic person who is not necessarily narcissistic). They are polar opposites (despite perhaps agreeing on some things that initially excited you) and it feels impossible to come to agreements about anything or truly trust each other. You inherently feel at odds with this person and even if you try your best to make the relationship work (counseling, honest conversations, date nights, etc), you will never feel fulfilled or truly happy in the relationship (sadly, many discount this as “normal”).

One reason for this is that, again, twin flames are constantly triggering each other into their core wounds, and while this is a good thing in the long run if you choose to learn from it, the common expectations we have for relationships are never met. Compassion, time spent together, caring, single-mindedness and vision for the relationship, compromise, communication, emotional and sexual intimacy become impossible to achieve with a twin flame. They are not meant to fulfill you — they are meant to help you recognize the parts of yourself that need work so you can fulfill yourselfThat doesn’t mean you don’t want to try to make the relationship work. In fact, the whole goal is to try — to try to find peace, compassion, understanding, love, compromise, communication. Often, though, this just won’t happen no matter how much work you put in. 

A soulmate on the other hand is the literal other half of your own soulYour soulmate is the masculine or feminine manifestation of you (even if you happen to be the same sex). They share the same mindset, goals, energy, beliefs — not dogma, and operating system. They will “get” you on a soul level because you share a consciousness even if you know nothing about each other, come from different parts of the world, are different religions, or have little externally in common. There is an unspoken rapport and understanding between you two because you come from the same place, so to speak. What is important to you is important to them, and you will both sacrifice in order to make the other’s needs and dreams come to fruition. It is reciprocal. 

Upon meeting a soulmate, some people report an intense feeling of love at first sight, others report seeing a literal shifting spark of light when their eyes meet, and yet others see past life images projected onto the face of this person (transfiguration). Though sometimes it comes as a fond remembrance that you cannot explain and an unconditional love you have never experienced on this planet. Many feel like time and space stop in the presence of this person and you lose track of everything around you. I am here to tell you, these people are not making it up — they are telling the truth. Sometimes the truth is beyond our understanding. It is up to you to decide whether you will entertain these ideas despite having no solid proof, or discount them as crazy. 

Before having a soulmate experience, you may feel that no one truly understands you or works to understand you; like no one puts in the effort, or like you cannot open up and truly be yourself. You may feel like there is a piece of you that is missing and if only you could find that piece, you would feel whole. You may have already been seeking this on a subconscious level your entire life. Some report feelings of being a “twin” yet not being born a multiple.

I do believe most all highly sensitive or empathic people are on a soulmate journey because of the implications for world peace. If we all found our way “home”, where there was ultimate acceptance, joy, and compassion for another in spite of the harsh realities of the world, how peaceful would we all feel? How much would we be able to accomplish in the world in order to make it a better place? These relationships are a higher calling and message of unconditional love that must be brought into ourselves and to the earth. Narcissistic people cannot experience this because they cannot compromise which is required of soulmates. 

Yes, there can be relationship challenges in a soulmate relationship but they are our “home base” in which we feel ultimate soul love and comfort and oneness and no circumstances can ever change that. You feel inextricably drawn to them and even if you want to stop the soul attraction, you cannot. It just is and was and will be. This transcends physical or intellectual attraction, which is how most romantic relationships begin. 

I will also say that meeting your soulmate may not be a happy experience. While the feelings it brings up for you may be positive, it is likely going to entail much hard work to get to a place where you two can make it work. Typically, one or both will be “runners” — running from the connection because it is too strong, makes you feel too vulnerable or seen, triggers your unresolved core wounds, or makes you see your flaws for what they really are. Not all soulmates come together because of the wounds of the past, which can end up extremely traumatic, but if you both want to, you can find a way. 

In order to begin a soulmate relationship, a few things must occur. First, you have to work through a good deal of your karma. Karma stands in the way of soulmates becoming close — or even meeting altogether. This is not a karmic relationship but a dharmic relationship; the good that comes after you resolve your karmic debt (though, don’t get me wrong — you can certainly have plenty of “bad” karma to resolve with them too — the difference is you both want to, work to, and fight to). 

You also have to work to balance your own soul. In other words, if you are a feminine soul (your biology often indicates this but not always), you need to work to become more masculine in order to have the feminine and masculine aspects of your soul in balance, and vice versa. It may sound counter-intuitive because, if a soulmate is the manifestation of the other part of you, you may think it is they who will complete you. But in fact, no other person not even a soulmate can complete you. You must do the hard work to complete yourself and become balanced and free of a great deal of karmic debt before soulmates can find each other in relationship otherwise the relationship can be codependent, have expectations that lead to disappointment, and be lopsided.

If you have already met your soulmate, here is what you can expect. First, you will begin a process called “ascension”. It is where your physical and emotional body are being re-calibrated to a higher frequency of love. It can cause literal physical detoxification sensations, such as parasite elimination, the need to change your diet, and an urge to become healthy. You will also experience the desire to heal yourself emotionally which will entail letting go of vices, negative self-talk, pessimism, and other unhealthy habits because what affects one affects the whole and the love is greater than any personal selfish desires which makes admitting to the problems and overcoming them worth it.

Soulmates often have a telepathic connection, whether literally in the mind, or through a resonance in the chakra centers. You may hear each other’s thoughts or feel each other’s energy — even if you are thousands of miles apart. Because of this, it is also important to work through any mental or emotional blocks because the fear of someone else knowing everything about you will act as a barrier to soulmates coming together. There is no privacy or hiding — scary for any person. It may sound beautiful for someone else to know everything about you but it is also intimidating because often our innermost thoughts can be cruel, judgmental, and negative. Also, if you have been treated like a piece of trash your whole life, you will likely treat yourself like this and a soulmate won’t be down for that. This relationship is about up-lifting, not tearing down. 

Identify the karma

You have to begin identifying how you feel around certain people to understand the past lifetime relationship patterns you are still living out. Once you identify these patterns from the past, you can understand your role in it in this lifetime and work to make it better — or leave if there is no way to resolve it together. What unspoken things are stressing you out about the relationship? What underlying assumptions does the relationship operate on? Who is in a role of subservience or superiority and why? Will they meet you half-way? Will they throw you a rope or will they shove you under the bus? Deep down, despite feeling you love them, are you wishing they would change but they never do?

Part of the reason people never graduate from their twin flame to their soulmate is marriage. Marriage is a social construct that is not in the best interest of people’s spiritual life lessons because it keeps people who should not be together in a relationship for years, decades, or their entire lifetime unable to truly self-actualize. Twin flame relationships are only meant to last until at least one party (ideally, both parties) has learned their lessons. If we begin to think about romantic relationships in this way (and even friendships, and relationships with bosses and coworkers), there is less stigma, shame, and pressure to stay forever. “‘Till death do us part” is not the goal; depth and growth are the goals.

Another reason people don’t graduate to their soulmate is fear of doing things differently or choosing what is best for themselves. The goal with any life lesson — including those karmic relationships — is to “flip the script” and create a new, healthy story line. What have you been wanting to do, to say, to become, but were too scared to because you didn’t think someone would be able to handle it? What kind of judgment or punishment do you fear from them? Are they simply apathetic about you (or you about them) and you crave real engagement or attention but haven’t pursued it? Are you miserable together and just going through the motions? Have you never been able to communicate or get on the same page? Are your needs being met or will they ever? Do they get mad when you want to change and grow?

If you can’t say with certainty that you will remain fulfilled or inspired in the relationship, it may be time to make the brave decision to fulfill your karma and end it. As always, it’s entirely dependent upon your situation and the choice is yours. 

Ready to reclaim your health and self? Click here to learn more about Nutrition Consultations, Energy Readings, and Body Readings. 

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The “Eve” wound is resurfacing – is it affecting you?

abuse, article, empath, energy, intuition, mind-body, narcissism, relationships, stress

Eve is the prototypical empath/intuitive in the Judeo-Christian religious texts and we can learn much from her experience. The Temptation of Eve, as told in Genesis, sets the tone for all intuitives and is embedded into the subconsciousness (or, collective unconscious – take your pick) of many. While some consider it fact, others allegory, and still others the product of imagination, I believe, like all religious texts or mythological stories, we can learn from it much about how to navigate the current state of affairs and why we feel, think, or act the way that we do. This is one interpretation, but know there are many. 

The story begins with God outlining firm commandments for man and woman in the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve obey what God has told them, including which trees to eat from — all but one in the middle of the garden. Then a serpent comes to Eve in Genesis 3:4-5 and encourages her to eat from the forbidden tree: “You will not surely die. For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” The serpent encourages Eve to think for herself and plants seeds of doubt in her mind: Why wouldn’t God allow you to eat from the tree of good and evil? Why wouldn’t God allow you to see the truth? Why would a loving god keep you blind?

Eve begins to question this herself. Why wouldn’t an all-knowing and all-loving god allow his creation to see things clearly for what they really are? Why isn’t Eve allowed to fully access her own decision making skills? Why can’t Eve be powerful? In Genesis 3:6 we see Eve’s thought process: “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate.” Eve took a hint, questioned the higher authority and made a decision for herself because she wanted to see the truth. She wanted to learn cause and effect, she wanted to see things from a different perspective. She wanted to be free to fully embrace the experience — without rules. 

Eve also gave fruit from the tree to her husband, Adam, and then he blames her for their error. It’s interesting that only Eve is required to engage in critical thinking skills, not Adam. (Remember my last blog where I spoke about the “Mother” archetypes putting up with bad behavior from the “Youth” archetypes because we’re scared to force them to grow up?). Eve knows she broke a law but if the law is unjust should one follow it? And should she be punished for allowing others to question the unjust laws? Adam surely could have said, “No, I don’t wish to break this commandment with you.” Rather, Adam blindly follows and is made out to be a bit of a dunce while Eve is painted as a premeditated temptress who should have known better. The man blames the woman’s personal decision making power (aka: intuition) and the woman blames the serpent for her desire to experience her intuition. It was truly a case of “I don’t know why I trusted my gut. I feel so ashamed for not obeying. My intuition made me do it”. 

As a result of Eve’s choice to discover, explore, and learn, she is punished — quite severely with no chance of forgiveness. Genesis 3:13-19 goes on to say,

“And the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?”
The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”
So the Lord God said to the serpent:
“Because you have done this,
You are cursed more than all cattle,
And more than every beast of the field;
On your belly you shall go,
And you shall eat dust
All the days of your life.
And I will put enmity
Between you and the woman,
And between your seed and her Seed;
He shall bruise your head,
And you shall bruise His heel.”
To the woman He said:
“I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception;
In pain you shall bring forth children;
Your desire shall be for your husband,
And he shall rule over you.”

“Then to Adam He said, “Because you have heeded the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree of which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat of it’:
“Cursed is the ground for your sake;
In toil you shall eat of it
All the days of your life.
Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you,
And you shall eat the herb of the field.
In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.”

The serpent is the representation of intuition. What God says to the serpent as he curses it is especially significant. God says that because the serpent offered Eve a choice that he should be distanced from woman. It is this distance that points to the loss of matrilineal intuition. It is no longer inherited or passed down; we must learn it ourselves despite great pain and consequential punishment. 

Intuition is learned through observation, choice, and the resulting cause and effect. (If you were born empathic, there’s a good chance you’re naturally intuitive, though you can greatly refine this skill by learning your life lessons.) If we understand that we have a right to have experiences in life and learn from them, we learn the principle of cause and effect. “If I do this, that happens”, “when this happens, I feel this way”. If we don’t know we even have a choice in the matter, we don’t have experiences — or don’t have the right experiences — and therefore we don’t learn how to become intuitive. It is that simple.

Women (and men’s) natural ability to engage in this kind of learning cycle is severely thwarted by the left-brained patriarchal system. There are unspoken rules we must follow in order to be successful in life: look good, act nice, talk sweet, don’t rock the boat, don’t usurp anyone’s power, don’t get messy. For many, their lives are planned out well before they have a decision in the matter and life starts a trajectory course to become the closest thing to whatever our family, friends, peers, or colleagues deem worthy. We can choose these in order to be successful, or we can choose ourselves against the odds. 

We tend to become very ashamed when we explore, experiment, live freely, or trust ourselves and it goes wrong. We can be blamed, scapegoated, mocked and shamed. “I told you that would never work out”, “I knew that was a pipe dream” we will be told. Then, if we have an experience that ends up being traumatic and we choose to speak out, we are often dissected and analyzed as though we cannot be trusted — as though we are guilty for having the experience. What we are seeing with the #MeToo movement is a reflection of this original Eve wound. If you think for yourself, you risk punishment. If your experience goes terribly wrong, it’s all your fault. If you choose to speak up against injustice, you will be punished. 

In the story of the Temptation of Eve, God is saying that Eve does not have permission to live an experiential life. He did not approve of her unintentional power play. As a result, Eve is punished with pain — literal physical pain in the form of childbirth — but also spiritual pain in that she will seek good energy from her spouse but not be able to see it reciprocated, and she will not be able to access the greater knowledge even though she is now aware it exists. Her punishment for questioning and experiencing is servitude, pain, and disconnect. It will be a life of pretending despite the knowing.

Yes it sounds archaic, but how many women would describe their marital relationships like this to this day? Many of the women I know and have worked with secretly feel this way even if they pretend things are fine or fair. Women seek the affirmation and desire of their spouses within the patriarchal system even if they are feminists. It is because we have been told, “if you do this and don’t do that, you will be happy.” “If you work to please me and ignore the real stirrings of your soul, you will be happy.” It is only when we question why we are in this system to begin with that we can see the system will never bring us peace or joy. 

The woman withdrawals because her spouse cannot intuit her needs, perhaps even though she can intuit his — or vice versa. She gets jealous when she sees him looking at other women and it is as though he is seeking someone or something that she will never be. Why does he see through me, she wonders. She quiets her intuitive abilities altogether because she seeks to get her husband’s love through the loops of patriarchy. She becomes more soft, more or less opinionated, more “done up”, and takes an interest in things she doesn’t really enjoy — or on the other extreme, she becomes withdrawn and resentful to try to get her needs met. Either way she works within this system, she cannot seem to quantify what she wants, why she misses it, or why she cannot get it no matter how “acceptable” she becomes.

She may seek the counsel of older women in her life only to have the same tired talking points reflected back to her: “what were you wearing?”, “why did you make him mad?”, “you shouldn’t have been there to begin with”, “but you’re not perfect so how can you be a victim?” Or perhaps you turn to a loved one to reveal abuse. They may choose the easy road and ignore your cries for help in lieu of upholding the family structure they don’t want to see fall apart. “They would never do such a thing; you are lying” you may be told.

I will say it again: just because someone is older or more accomplished does not mean they have undergone the life lessons which gives them character and a strong intuitive sense for right and wrong. It is why we are seeing friends and family turn against each other as problems arise in life and in the global political sphere. All that matters is how much soul work you have done and the masks are being lifted so everyone can get a glimpse. 

The most important thing to remember is we cannot win within the toxic masculine system. There is no real way to get emotional needs met, have truly liberating experiences, learn what we want to, become who we want to, or make things fair while the system is still present. It only perpetuates victim blaming and shaming and a loss of feminine intuitive abilities. If you naturally feel guilty or have a shame complex, please know it is not you — it is the system. This is a deep wound many carry that originates long ago but is still societally acted out to this day. The only way to beat it is to not participate in the system. You are not Eve and you don’t deserve to be punished. 

Ready to reclaim your health and self? Click here to learn more about Nutrition Consultations, Energy Readings, and Body Readings. 

Liz’s interview with “The Empath Guy” Dave Markowitz

AUTOIMMUNE, chronic illness, empath, energy, glands, holistic, mind-body, radio, relationships, stress, thyroid, Uncategorized

For the last seven years, I have primarily been working with women with thyroid and autoimmune conditions get to the root of their health conditions with tailored, optimized nutrition. 

However, the last couple of years, I began noticing many of my clients were dealing with so much emotional stress and this stress was actually a root cause of their physical problems. In fact, they weren’t just stressed –  they had a certain personality type and had no idea. They weren’t just stressed, depressed, anxious — they were empathic and were being controlled and left powerless in their lives. So I began offering spiritual services to help people overcome these stressors. And it worked.

I’ve become so interested and engrossed in researching this personality type and helping those who are born empathic because I see how healing it is to one’s physical health when a person understands themselves on a deeper level. 

So today I bring to you an interview I recently had with someone who has been on this empathic path for quite some time and who has also noticed how much stress affects people who are highly sensitive.

So let me introduce to you Dave Markowitz. Dave is an empath and intuitive and has been working with highly sensitive souls for many years, helping them achieve better health, vitality, and spiritual awareness.

He is the author of several books, including Healing with Source, Self-care for the self-aware: a guide for highly sensitive people, empaths, intuitives, and healers, and Empathipedia. Dave has lectured with Deepak Chopra and Gary Null and he also gets empaths and their unique struggles.

Tune in here to hear us speak about empaths, absorbing other people’s energy and problems, a victim mentality, the ego, narcissism, health challenges and their root causes, spirituality and more!

Listen here <——-

 

Ready to reclaim your health and self? Click here to learn more about Nutrition Consultations, Energy Readings, and Body Readings.